To my children,
My sparkly little girl with a bright, shiny smile. Not all girls receive jewelry on Valentine's Day. Please don't act as if your heart has broken in two because you didn't get something shiny on this special day. I have been with your father for 15 years, and never once have I received a piece of bling on the Day of Love. Maybe you've been watching too much T.V.? The group gift of the M&M dispenser will have to do.
Thank goodness you're cute, because the screaming-tantrum-fit-throwing is getting a little annoying lately. Let's work on that before you fly the nest and leave me for kindergarten...mmmkay?
All I can say is, the cupcake won...
When did you stop calling me mama, and now feel the need to address me in this manner? S'up, lady?
My kids can be the sweetest, sometimes, you know?