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Sunday, June 19, 2011

Bridge Over Troubled Water...

Father's Day...

I couldn't think of anything to write.

I wanted it to be perfect; to show my feelings; wear my heart on this page...often hard for me to do.

And then this song came on during my morning run...and I immediately thought of my dad. So fitting on this Father's Day. I sometimes forward right through this song when I'm running because it has such a soft, flowing, beautiful beat...not at all what I consider a running tune. But I listened to it over and over and let it be an inspiration.

Bridge Over Troubled Water by Simon and Garfunkel 

When you're weary
Feeling small
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all
I'm on your side
When times get rough
And friends just can't be found
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down

My parents got divorced when I was too young to remember.

My dad was a weekend and summer dad; not always by choice.

I remember him asking me if I wanted to come and live with them when I was in the 7th grade...I fell completely silent. It was always my childhood dream to live with him. He was my knight in shining armor, my rescuer from my dysfunctional mother. I laid in bed at night when I was very little and wanted to escape to his house; wondering why doesn't he know I need to be rescued? When will he come for me?

In all actuality he probably had no clue I needed to be rescued, because if I had been rescued, I would probably have been taken away from my mother. As a little girl, it was hard to sort this out in my head.

But now, in the 7th grade, it was too late. I had my friends, a school that I loved, and I actually FIT IN. How could I choose now...between my father and my mother?
 
When you're down and out
When you're on the street
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you
I'll take your part
When darkness comes
And pain is all around 
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down

On the weekends, when I was at his house, he would play records of Simon and Garfunkel. We listened to the "oldies" station on the radio when he would drive me home. The melodies and harmonies lulled me to calm. So peaceful, patient and kind; like my father. 

Sail on silver girl
Sail on by
Your time has come to shine
All your dreams are on their way
See how they shine
If you need a friend
I'm sailing right behind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind

I'm sure there were times he yelled, or lost his patience, but I never saw it. Maybe an advantage to being a "weekend kid".

I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason...growing up with dysfunction has taught me how to give my kids normal.

Thanks for showing me normal, Dad. Even if it was only on the weekends and during the summer.

   

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